Death Takes a Holiday by: David McCannon

During those days people will seek death but will not find it; they will long to die, but death will elude them.

 Revelation 9:6 NIV

I could hear the voice of death inside my head. This demon wanted me to take my life. I could look into the mirror and I could see him staring from my eyes. The person looking back was not me. 

I could hear him inside my head telling me I would be better off dead. I hated myself. I could not turn off that nagging voice. It told me, "No one will miss you. You're are a burden to others. The only way to end your pain is to kill yourself. You are better off dead."

No matter how hard I tried I could not die. I have had more attempts at suicide than I can count. Every attempt failed.

My social worker told me, "David, you mine as well give up because you're not capable of dying. You are immortal until God call you home. God is not finished with me yet."

My problem was a spiritual problem. I didn’t know who I was in Christ. I needed a truth encounter, not a power encounter. Jesus set me free.

I looked for love and acceptance in all the wrong places. If only I had a wife I would be happy. If I worked hard and got the next promotion, I would be happy. In my codependency I told myself if I tried to keep everyone happy, I would be loved and accepted.

When I was growing up, I heard of this thing called the victorious Christian life. I was convinced it was a myth. All I had was heartache and pain. I was bitter with God for taking my love ones from me; especially my mom. She was only 54. I felt like God gave me a raw deal. For many years, I lived with terrible depression. When things didn’t go my way, I would have a big old pity party. Like Job, I regretted the day I was born. Many times, I prayed asking God to bring my life to an end. The more I cried, the worse I felt.

I was bad about stockpiling medicine. I would hoard up medication to plan my next suicide attempt. This went on from 2007, and did not end until 2014. This is when my friend Johnny Price got me into a personal care home called County Manor.

When I moved to Elberton, I started going to Celebrate Recovery. It was there I learned that I had a lovingly heavenly father that cared about me. He wanted me to prosper. God had a greater plan for me. He did not want me to live in misery. I use to take everything people said to heart. My feelings were easily hurt. It was easy because I had a bad self-image.

It was at Celebrate Recovery I learn to let go of my self-hate and the resentment I held against myself and others. I went through a step study with Johnny Price. It changed my life. I am now happier than any point of my life. I am not the same David. I have been born again into the family of God.

 Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold all things are become new.

2 Corinthians 5:17 KJV  
Mental Health Night
OCT11

Mental Health Night

Public

The topic for this meeting is Mental Health. David Waye McCannon will be giving his testimony and talking about his own personal struggle with mental illness. Pastor Gary Purvis will be talking about Principle 2. His is the associate pastor at First Baptist and runs the Shepherds Care Counseling. Mark this event on your calendar. Don't miss it.

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